When we are in a relationship with someone, not matter what kind, it often seems like there is no way to repair the damage when the relationship is broken. Marriages end, children are estranged from parents for decades, and people die having never restored themselves to each other. We see this so often that we believe that all relationships are like that. That is not true.
First of all, most relationships that are broken and not repaired are that way because one side or the other refuses to restore the relationship. It may be out of anger or the feeling that a restored relationship will only bring a return of the problem that began the rift in the first place. In order for a relationship to be restored, there has to be several changes. A change must come in the situation and a change must come in the mind and heart of those in the relationship.
The situation could be an argument that resulted in statements being made that established hurt feelings or a refusal to associate with the other. The situation could be a stance on an issue that is outside the bounds of one person's acceptable living limits. The situations are usually real problems, but are not always unchangeable.
The other change takes place in the heart of those involved. We have to be willing to listen and understand. Possibly a misunderstanding has taken place and can be corrected. Possibly the situation is exactly as it was originally understood and a change in the situation must occur. Then a decision can be made as to whether the relationship is worth the surrender of the stand we have taken.
All of these scenarios involve an evaluation of something we hold dear, our control. Our ability to decide what we want. Sometimes that is the source of our broken relationship.
There is one relationship, however that has a different set of rules. Our relationship with God. When there is something wrong with our relationship with God, it is easy to figure out where the change needs to happen. Why do I say this?
God never changes.
Every good gift and every perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of lights with whom there is no variation or shadow due to change. James 1:17
God is never unfair. He is perfectly just based on the way He designed the universe. He made the rules.
No matter how much we want to have a say in it, they are already set and do not change.
God always forgives someone who honestly asks Him for forgiveness. No matter what it is. But we have to be the ones to change. We have to REPENT or change our ways and ask him to forgive us.
If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and cleanse us from all unrighteousness. 1 John 1:9
God has already sacrificed in an order to restore the relationship.
but God shows his love for us in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us.
Romans 5:8
Whether we are spending our lives not in a relationship with God because of anger or because we feel unworthy or because we are in a situation that is against God's universe, the fault is not God's. We can be consumed with the desire to control our own choices, but ultimately they must align with God.
We must confess that Jesus is Lord of all including us. We must recognize Him and be willing to give up control.
Next we must ask forgiveness and for restoration of the relationship. He has promised to say yes.
"If you confess with your mouth "Jesus is Lord" and trust in your heart that God raised Him from the dead, you will be saved."
The relationship is maintained just like most other relationships. Talk together often. Learn everything you can about each other. Choose to do things that improve the relationship whenever you can.
It's not too late.
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